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Some New Some Old

There's always a lot to be thankful for, if you take time to look for it.

For example, I am sitting here thinking how nice it is that wrinkles don't hurt.

People want the front of the bus; back of the church and center of attention.

Somebody once figured out that we have 35 million laws trying to enforce 10 commandments.

When I'm feeling down, I like to whistle. It makes the neighbor's dog that barks all the time run to the end of his chain and gag himself.

If you can't be kind, at least have the decency to be vague.

A penny saved is a government oversight.

The older you get, the tougher it is to lose weight, because by then your body and your fat are really good friends.

The easiest way to find something lost around the house is to buy a replacement.

He who hesitates is probably right.

If you can smile when things go wrong, you have someone in mind to blame.

The sole purpose of a child's middle name, is so he can tell when he's really in trouble.

If ignorance is bliss, why aren't more people happy?

Everything should be made as simple as possible, but no simpler.

Once over the hill, you pick up speed.

I love cooking with wine. Sometimes I even put it in the food.

If not for STRESS I'd have no energy at all.

Whatever hits the fan will not be evenly distributed.

Everyone has a photographic memory. Some just don't have film.

I know God won't give me more than I can handle. I just wish He didn't trust me so much.

You don't stop laughing because you grow old. You grow old because you stop laughing.

We cannot change the direction of the wind... but we can adjust our sails.

Have an awesome day, and know that someone has thought about you today!

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