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Heavenly Tax Problems

Many years from now, former President Clinton goes to the pearly gates of Heaven. "You can't get in," says St. Peter. "You cheated on your taxes, you lied to the people who trusted you, and you were a womanizer."

"What will it take to let me in?" asked Clinton.

St. Peter thought about it for a moment and said, "Well, since you took advantage of only beautiful women, I think it is only fitting that you be reminded of your heinous disrespect for all women and he produced the ugliest lady that Bill Clinton had ever seen. You'll have to spend eternity with this lady."

Clinton winced at the prospect but agreed, if it was to be the only way to get into Heaven. He wandered off with the ugly woman on his arm and soon ran into James MacDougal, with an even uglier looking woman on his arm. "Guess you had trouble getting into Heaven too," Clinton said. "Yep, tax problems mainly," replied MacDougal.

They were still conversing when along came Ross Perot. He had a fantastic looking blonde on one arm and a buxom redhead on the other and two drop-dead gorgeous brunettes following behind him. "Did you have a problem getting into Heaven, Ross?" asked Clinton, admiring the beauty of the women.

"Nope, not at all," replied Ross Perot, "...but these ladies had real bad tax problems back on Earth!"

When Clinton got back to the Oval Office, he called the president of the Trojan Condom Company. "I need a favor from you, Peter," said Clinton. "I need you to send about 5 million condoms to Boris Yeltsin in the USSR. The condoms must be 10 inches long and 2 inches wide. On each condom, I want you to write 'MADE IN USA' on one side, and 'SIZE - SMALL' on the other."

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