A little girl was talking to her teacher about whales. The teacher said it was physically
impossible for a whale to swallow a human because even though it was a very large mammal
its throat was very small.The little girl stated that Jonah was swallowed by a whale.
Irritated, the teacher reiterated that a whale could not swallow a human; it was
physically impossible.
The little girl said, "When I get to heaven I will ask Jonah".
The teacher asked, " What if Jonah went to hell?"
The little girl replied, "Then you ask him"
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A Kindergarten teacher was
observing her classroom of children while they were drawing. She would occasionally walk
around to see each child's work.
As she got to one little girl who was working diligently, she asked what the drawing was.
The girl replied, "I'm drawing God."
The teacher paused and said, "But no one knows what God looks like."
Without missing a beat, or looking up from her drawing, the girl replied, "They will
in a minute."
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A Sunday school teacher was
discussing the Ten Commandments with her five and six year olds. After explaining the
commandment to "honor" thy Father and thy Mother, she asked, "Is there a
commandment that teaches us how to treat our brothers and sisters?"
Without missing a beat one little boy (the oldest of a family) answered, "Thou shall
not kill."
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One day a little girl was
sitting and watching her mother do the dishes at the kitchen sink. She suddenly noticed
that her mother had several strands of white hair sticking out in contrast on her brunette
head.
She looked at her mother and inquisitively asked, "Why are some of your hairs white,
Mom?"
Her mother replied, "Well, every time that you do something wrong and make me cry or
unhappy, one of my hairs turns white."
The little girl thought about this revelation for a while and then said, "Momma, how
come ALL of grandma's hairs are white?"
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The children had all been
photographed, and the teacher was trying to persuade them each to buy a copy of the group
picture "Just think how nice it will be to look at it when you are all grown up and
say, 'There's Jennifer, she's a lawyer,' or 'That's Michael, He's a doctor.'
A small voice at the back of the room rang out, "And there's the teacher, She's
dead."
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A teacher was giving a lesson
on the circulation of the blood. Trying to make the matter clearer, she said, "Now,
class, if I stood on my head, the blood, as you know, would run into it, and I would turn
red in the face.."
"Yes," the class said.
"Then why is it that while I am standing upright in the ordinary position the blood
doesn't run into my feet?
A little fellow shouted.
"Cause your feet ain't empty."
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The children were lined up in
the cafeteria of a Catholic elementary school for lunch. At the head of the table was a
large pile of apples. The nun made a note, and posted on the apple tray:
"Take only ONE. God is watching."
Moving further along the lunch line, at the other end of the table was a large pile of
chocolate chip cookies.
A child had written a note, "Take all you want. God is watching the apples.
