You Are Here: home » true stories » computer complaints
Take heart, anyone among you who
believes you are technologically challenged, you "ain't seen
nuthin' yet." These are actual complaints made by computer
1. Compaq is considering changing the command "Press Any
Key" to "Press Return Key" because of the flood of
calls asking where the "Any" key is.
2. AST technical support had a caller complaining that her mouse
was hard to control with the dust cover on. The cover turned out
to be the plastic bag the mouse was packaged in.
3. A Dell technician advised his customer to put his troubled
floppy back in the drive and close the door. The customer asked
the tech to hold on and was heard putting the phone down, getting
up and crossing the room to close the door.
4. Another Dell customer called to say he couldn't get his
computer to fax anything. After 40 minutes of troubleshooting, the
technician discovered the man was trying to fax a piece of paper
by holding it in front of the monitor screen and hitting the
5. Yet another Dell customer called to complain that his keyboar!
d no longer worked. He had cleaned it by filling up his tub with
soap and water and soaking the keyboard for a day, then removing
all the keys and washing them individually.
6. A confused caller to IBM was having trouble printing documents.
He told the technician that the computer had said it
"couldn't find printer" The user had also tried turning
the computer screen to face the printer but that his computer
still couldn't "see" the printer.
7. An exasperated caller to Dell Tech Support couldn't get her new
Dell Computer to turn on. After ensuring the computer was plugged
in, the technician asked her what happened when she pushed the
power button. Her response, "I pushed and pushed on this foot
pedal and nothing happens." The "foot pedal" turned
out to be the computer's mouse.
8. A woman called the Canon help desk with a problem with her
printer. The tech asked her if she was running it under
"Windows." The woman responded, "No, my desk is
next to the door. But that is a good point. The man sitting in the
cubicle next to me is under a window and his printer is working
9. Tech Support: "O.K. Bob, let's press control and escape
keys at the same time. That brings up a task list in the middle of
the screen. Now type the letter "P" to bring up the
Program Manager." Customer: "I don't have a
"P". Tech: "On your keyboard, Bob." Customer:
"What do you mean?" Tech: ""P" on your
keyboard, Bob." Customer: "I'm not going to do
Comment or Share Your Own One Liner