The following are a
sampling of REAL answers received on exams given by the California
Department of Transportation's driving school (read Saturday
Traffic School for moving violation offenders.)
Q: Do you yield when a blind pedestrian is crossing the road?
A: What for? He can't see my license plate.
Q: Who has the right of way when four cars approach
a four-way stop at the same time?
A: The pick-up truck with the gun rack and the bumper sticker
saying, "Guns don't kill people. I do."
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Q: What are the important safety tips to remember when backing
your car?
A: Always wear a condom.
Q: When driving through fog, what should you use?
A: Your car.
Q: How can you reduce the possibility of having an accident?
A: Be too sh*t-faced to find your keys.
Q: What problems would you face if you were arrested for drunk
driving.
A: I'd probably lose my buzz a lot faster.
Q: What changes would occur in your lifestyle if you could no
longer drive lawfully?
A: I would be forced to drive unlawfully.
Q: What are some points to remember when passing or being passed?
A: Make eye contact and wave "hello" if he/she is cute.
Q: What is the difference between a flashing red traffic light and
a flashing yellow traffic light?
A: The color.
Q: How do you deal with heavy traffic?
A: Heavy psychedelics.
Q: What can you do to help ease a heavy traffic problem?
A: Carry loaded weapons.
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