Do Lawyers Ask Dumb Questions?

Is It My Imagination OR.... Do Lawyers Ask Dumb Questions?

Q. Did he pick the dog up by the ears?
A. No.
Q. What was he doing with the dog's ears?
A. Picking them up in the air.
Q. Where was the dog at this time?
A. Attached to the ears.

Q. And lastly, Tom, all your responses must be oral. O.K. What school do you go to?
A. Oral.
Q. How old are you?
A. Oral.

Q. Now, you have investigated other murders, have you not, where there was a victim?

Q. Did you tell your lawyer that your husband had offered you indignities?
A. He didn't offer me nothing; he just said I could have the furniture.

Q. Could you see him from where you were standing?
A. I could see his head.

Q. And where was his head?
A. Just above his shoulders.

Q. Do you drink when you're on duty?
A. I don't drink when I'm on duty, unless I come on duty drunk.

Q. ...any suggestions as to what prevented this from being a murder trial instead of an attempted murder trial?
A. Uhh... just one: the victim lived.

Q. What is the meaning of sperm being present?
A. It indicates intercourse.
Q. Male sperm?

Q. Now then, was that the same nose you broke as a child?